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Les Bonobos
Laurent Baffie
Les Bonobos
photo : DR
Actes du théâtre n° 54.[ imprimer ]
It’s the story of three buddies who have known each other since childhood.
Alex is blind, Dany is deaf and Benjamin is mute.
Although our three characters look a lot like the 3 wise monkeys, their irresistible desire to copulate puts them decidedly in the bonobo category!
But what to do in order to have non-paying sex when you’re handicapped?
The solution is simple: just stop being handicapped.

“Baffie’s inventions are effective - in both his writing and staging. […] There are never any lulls, and his style full of humor also leaves room for feelings to come out.”
M.-C. Nivière, Pariscope, October 26, 2011

“This production really makes other light comedies look dated. A webcam, sound effects and a laptop are actors in their own right, provoking the audience’s hilarity. The laughter “mechanism” is aptly named here. The machines go on the blink, the actors adapt and try to fix them. The mix of recurring gags is perfect, the play is divided into clear chapters, and the lines are full of double meanings.”
Julien Jouanneau, L’Express.fr, September 12, 2011

Opened at the Théâtre du Palais-Royal, September 9, 2011.
Directed by the playwright. Assistant director: Sonia Sariel.
Set Design: Stéfanie Jarre. Assistant: Jeanne Bizard. Costumes: Véronique Perier. Lighting: Omar Boukder. Cast: Laurent Baffie alternating with Alain Bouzigues, Caroline Anglade, Jean-Noël Brouté, Camille Chamoux, Karine Dubernet, Marc Fayet.

Characters : 3 women - 3 men -

(Alex is blind, Dany is deaf and Benjamin is mute.)

ALEX Would you keep on going with whores if we could have girls in a normal way?
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY No of course not. Ah, Ben says he’d continue.
ALEX I’m not surprised, Ben, you’re such a perv. (Ben gets excited and starts making obscene movements) No Dany, don’t bother translating.
DANY So, tell us your stupid argument.
ALEX It’s simple, guys. Why do we go whoring on Saturdays?
DANY Well, according to Ben it’s because that’s when there’s the most choice.
ALEX Ok, I didn’t express myself clearly. I’ll start over. Why do we go whoring?
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY To get laid?
ALEX Yes OK, but why do we screw whores?
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY I told you before - because we can’t screw any girls otherwise.
ALEX Why not?
DANY Are you doing this on purpose or what?
ALEX No, I want to hear you say it - why can’t we screw any girls otherwise?
DANY Because we’re handicapped and could never get to first base with any girls since we were teenagers, except for one or two affairs, so the best way for us to get laid is to go whoring, so there!
ALEX So what’s the solution?
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY Solution?
ALEX Yes, what’s the solution for screwing something other than a whore?
DANY I can’t think of one, and neither can Ben - unless chicks stop fantasizing about Brad Pitt and set their caps on the deaf, dumb and blind.
ALEX Well here’s the solution. The solution would be for us to stop being handicapped.
DANY Of course, we’re so stupid, we didn’t even think of that.
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY Ben says it’s blindingly obvious.
ALEX Luckily I’m here to do the thinking for you guys.
DANY Ben wants to know the plan.
ALEX The plan is simple. We’ll try to pick up girls by pretending we’re not handicapped.
BEN (SIGNING) / DANY Great. And where will that miracle happen - on a pilgrimage to Lourdes?