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Du piment dans le caviar
Carole Greep et Guillaume Labbé
Du piment dans le caviar
Photo : DR
Actes du théâtre n° 63.[ imprimer ]
Philippe Dumont-Jacquet is a psychoanalyst, his wife Isabelle a writer. The self-righteous bobo couple have sunk into their everyday creature comforts where the only worry is choosing which balsamic vinegar or which orchestration of a Mozart piece to buy. In short, they’re a couple with no issues. No issues? Until the day that Daniel Charot, aka ‘‘Carrion’’, shows up. He’s a jailbird recently released from prison who has taken refuge in their house, moved in actually, well in fact settled in for what looks like an indefinite time.

Opened in Puteaux January 10, 2013.
Director: Thierry Lavat. Cast: Anne Bouvier, Laurent Ournac, Patrick Guérineau.

Characters : 1 women - 2 men -

PHILIPPE Can you explain what’s going on?
ISABELLE (out loud) What?
PHILIPPE Shhhh!! Can you explain why there’s a mentally ill person, probably responsible for some genocide, or even worse...
ISABELLE (out loud) What could be worse?
PHILIPPE Shhhh!! Don’t be a pain in the ass, Isabelle. Who’s having a leisurely shower with my coconut body wash?
ISABELLE (out loud) Oh good heavens! Are you afraid he’ll use up all your shower gel?
PHILIPPE Don’t mess around with me, Isabelle.
Isabelle starts whispering too.
ISABELLE How scary can he be ? He was a file clerk before.
PHILIPPE Right, and Mesrine was the life of the party, Dutroux collected Panini comics and Hitler made pretty watercolors.
ISABELLE He served his sentence and there’s no reason not to help him. Need I remind you that we’re liberals ?
PHILIPPE (Annoyed) Nah... Listen, I’m the first to give. I donated for Rwanda but that doesn’t mean I want some legless cripple in my living room.
ISABELLE Ah, so that’s your way of being generous, is it? You give so you won’t have to see all the misery.
PHILIPPE Exactly. There’s no such thing as free generosity. There’s always some disguised self-interest. I give to assuage my guilt and get a tax deduction. You give to get an ego boost and to feed the bourgeois fantasies you can’t come to terms with. But that’s not the issue. What the hell’s he doing here ?
ISABELLE A tax deduction?
PHILIPPE Shit! I forgot to include my contribution to Secours Populaire. Damn it, we’re going into a higher bracket ! Anyway, who cares why we give? Do you think the little African kids whose eyes are being eaten by flies are going to reimburse us because we didn’t give for the right reasons? No! They’ll take our cash! Otherwise they’ll croak!
ISABELLE You’re so crude. Fear has made you crude, Philippe.