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Un week-end sur deux (et la moitié des vacances scolaires)
Jean Franco et Guillaume Mélanie
Un week-end sur deux (et la moitié des vacances scolaires)
photo: DR
Actes du théâtre n° 92.[ imprimer ]
Julie lives with Julien and together they're raising Jules, the baby she had with Antoine.
To ensure the little one's equilibrium, she has brought everyone together for a week's vacation at the seaside. They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

"Well written, well acted, sweet and funny." Sorties à Paris

" original subject and a top quality text ... Irresistibly funny!" Théâtral Magazine

"Compelling and entertaining, to be enjoyed without restraint. " Télérama Sortir

Opened at the Théâtre Edgar (Paris), September 4, 2015.
The play will be presented at the Avignon off Festival from July 7-31, 2016, at the Théâtre des Béliers, at 9 p.m.
Cast: Alexandra Chouraqui, Jean Franco, Guillaume Mélanie.

Characters : 1 women - 2 men -
Editions Art & Comédie

In Tableau one

JULIEN (forcing a smile) Hello, Antoine. How are you doing?
ANTOINE A bit crummy ... (To Julie.) My heart attack, you know?
JULIE Oh right ...
JULIEN His what?
JULIE Antoine has had a heart attack.
JULIEN What? Now?!
ANTOINE (massaging his arms painfully) No, for the past two years.
JULIEN (to Julie) Could you explain that?
JULIE He's got a - slow - heart attack.
Julien makes a face.
ANTOINE You should know about that, right? ... You're a nurse.
JULIEN Yes as it happens, I am a nurse. And as it happens I've never heard of that.
ANTOINE Mind you, a nurse isn't a doctor ...
JULIEN What's that supposed to mean?
ANTOINE Well, think of your car - you'd want it repaired by a garage mechanic, not by a gas station attendant. It's the same thing ...
JULIE (stepping in before things get nasty) Do you want something to drink?
ANTOINE I'll take some Tylenol if you've got any ...
She exits. Silence. The two men are at either end of the terrace.
ANTOINE (inspecting the place) So this is what we're renting?
JULIEN Yes ... Nice, isn't it?
ANTOINE I was expecting something roomier, for the price ...
JULIEN This is August. (A beat.) And it's so cool, the beach is only a two-minute walk.
ANTOINE I can't swim. Tell me: is there a defibrillator in the house?
JULIEN I don't think so ... But I'll be here! (…) (A beat.) We were expecting you a bit earlier I think, right? ...
ANTOINE Yes, I went up by the Loire Valley chateaux. On the Loire River.
JULIEN In a kayak?
ANTOINE Well no ...
JULIEN Seeing as you're seven hours late I was wondering if you weren't up the creek without a paddle ...
ANTOINE Is that a criticism?
JULIEN No, a question.
Julie reappears.
JULIE I've only got Ibuprofen. 400.
ANTOINE Perfect. Ibuprofen has a slight anti-inflammatory effect, so it'll soothe my tendinitis a bit.
JULIEN You've got tendinitis?
ANTOINE Yes, in my solar plexus.
JULIE Tendinitis in your solar plexus?
ANTOINE It's because of my asthma attacks: I'm breathing too hard. So it overworks the muscles in my solar plexus. They get inflamed. And then, wham, tendinitis.
JULIEN (softly) OK, this is actually going to be really annoying ...